In a series of less than perfect life-decisions you ended up taking the wrong road. You made a fateful turn and now you are miles into a regretful decision. The reality of your mistake is hitting you in the face with the full force of its implications.
At first you felt panic, but now the panic has given way to resignation. You feel like you have no other option. This fatalism is not the thinking of someone who understands they are loved, forgiven and accepted by God. God is not a punisher – He is your Father. He wants you to make this journey with joy. When did you start believing that God has no other plan of rescue apart from letting you continue down this road of sorrow and regret?
There is no going back to square one and starting all over again. You would never be able find your way back through all the mistakes. God doesn’t want a list of promises from you to never do this again. He knows you don’t want to repeat this journey. What He wants from you is to offer Him a repentant and humble heart. Once He has your heart in His hand He will pick you up from this painful road and put you on the road He wanted you to take in the first place. That is how a loving Father relates to His children.