Each time we perform to feel loved we deform love's beauty. In our performance, we become a slave to a conditional form of false love that Jesus came to set us free from.
Performance is subtle. It can masquerade as religious dedication but when you begin to peel back its layers you will discover it is the thinking of a slave still living in bondage. Faithfulness and healthy obedience is something different. It flows from an understanding of the love of God in its purest form – a love that can only be received, not gained through performing to a certain standard. This understanding comes when we realize we can do nothing to gain God’s love. It is a gift. We can only receive it. The beauty and effect of this kind of love will change the quality of our earthly relationships.
Examine your relationships to see which ones require your performance to maintain. This can be a fearful examination but the outcome is so freeing. Until we are healed of a deformed understanding of love we will continue to invite performance-based relationships into our lives or seek them out to fill an empty place in our heart that only the unconditional love of God can fill.